Here are 10 things that are holding you back! Take action on these and develop the good habits necessary for success.
1. Complaining too much
The moment that we complain and view ourselves as being the ‘victim’, we absolve ourselves from taking responsibility. Accept the situation for what it is and take responsibility for taking the necessary action.
2. Attribution Bias
Okay, so here is an example. When we don’t succeed we say that we are overworked, under resourced or not supported. However, where others fail, we view them as being lazy or unprofessional. Effectively attributing our successes to ourselves and failures to others. Instead, take the time to recognise your own innate biases and view situations with absolute objectivity and curiosity.
3. Being a people pleaser
Most of us want to feel accepted by others and there is nothing wrong with this in the main. The problem however is where we constantly put the needs of others ahead of our own. Recognise your own needs and meet those too!
4. Constantly apologising
Linked to being a ‘people pleaser’ is constantly apologising when there is clearly nothing to be sorry about. When we engage in this it undermines our own capability and we are viewed as being of lesser value. Yes, demonstrate humility but only apologise where you have actually done something wrong!
5. Thinking its win/lose
Stop thinking that in order for you to win, others have to lose. Rather work collaboratively with others and adopt a win/win mindset! How can you mutually support one another to mutual benefit?
6. Forgetting self-leadership
For most, when they think about leadership they think about leading others. However, before leading others you must be able to lead yourself. Do you have self-awareness and clarity of direction? What are your micro-goals and larger objectives? Are you holding yourself accountable for your own thinking and behaviour?
7. Imposter syndrome
Are you living in fear that you are about to be found out? If only others knew how incapable you are! The reality is that most people suffer from a lack of confidence from time to time. Recognise your strengths and capabilities. Think about those times when things have gone well and when you felt ‘on top of the world’. No doubt there will be room for improvement too, so get busy developing yourself!
8. Negative self-talk
Linked to the previous point is negative self-talk. ‘If only I was good enough’, ‘How could I have been so stupid’! Remember that the loudest critic is often ourselves. Try to catch those moments when your inner narrative is negative and try to reframe the situation.
9. Not writing down your goals
If you have no direction in life then you shouldn’t be surprised with where you end up! Writing down your goals and revisiting them regularly will provide the focus and clarity that you need.
10. Allowing the Drift
So many of us drift through life aimlessly. Days, weeks, months and years pass us by and we wonder where the time has gone and whatever happened to our dreams and aspirations?! Think about what is important in your life? What are the things that you want to achieve? Get started today, not tomorrow with acting on those ambitions!
Joe McDonald, founder of create10 is a professional coach and trainer. He supports individuals with confidential one to one coaching, delivers impactful team performance workshops and provides affordable online courses. Email firstname.lastname@example.org for further information or see www.create10.ie